Can a guy tell if a girl's a virgin?

Is there any way a guy can know whether or not a girl is a virgin when they have sex? Does she always bleed if it's the first time?

Many people believe that bleeding after intercourse is a sign of virginity because it proves that the hymen — a thin, fleshy membrane that partially covers the vaginal opening — "broke." But not all women bleed the first time they have sex. Not only can hymen tissue simply stretch during penetration, rather than tear and bleed, but it is also very common for the hymen to rip before a woman ever has sex. Physical exercise, like riding a bike or doing gymnastics, injury to the genital area, or inserting a tampon, finger, or sex toy into the vagina can all cause the hymen to split. Sometimes there will be discomfort and blood when the hymen tears, or there may be no blood or pain at all. In fact, you may not even know when your hymen breaks.

On the other hand, post-sex bleeding can occur for a variety of reasons besides a broken hymen, such as different types of infections, polyps of the cervix or abnormal cervical cells, and a tear in the vagina from vigorous sex without enough lubrication.

So, while a man might assume that a woman who bleeds after sex is a virgin, the only way for him to know for sure is if she tells him.

TechnoGaze: Are you in Search of Independent Escorts in Bhopal?

Men want to sometime with a beautiful woman, especially at events or in parties. Hiring independent escorts in Bhopal can be a great choice when a companion is needed. However using companionship of escorts probably has some challenges which can be sort out by keeping certain important points in mind. Here is some advice to keep you out of the trouble.

• Using a reputed and well-reviewed escort services is the finest way to avoid glitches. These agencies are able to meet client needs in a better way.
• Before hiring an escort it is extremely necessary to read their reviews. As reviews outline the positive and negative points, it is easier for you to understand whether the specific escort is able to meet your requirements or not.
• Always have a small conversation before hiring any escort. It is good to look for the one who offers companionship primarily as it is the sign of legitimacy and will also be closer to what you exactly wanted.
• In order to avoid embarrassment and awkwardness try to meet the woman prior to event. This will be helpful for you to prepare up for the time that you are about to spend with her.
• Always make sure you respect that woman. Have an initial conversation telling her about your expectations.
• If you are going for an event or to meet with your friends, tell her the initials about yourself. This will help her too know a little about you. Keep in mind not to share everything about you with her. Keep your information minimal and explain your friends that she is a friend of family.
• The donation part is important. While you may need to negotiate with her for the charge of evening always refer that payment as donation rather than fee.

Independent escorts in Bhopal are able to meet client’s needs and assure that you won’t face any problems. Hire these beautiful escorts and you’ll be sure to have a pleasurable experience with them that will make your evening a memorable one.

Losing Your Virginity and Having Sex for the First Time

Read these 22 important tips before losing your virginity and having sex for the first time if you truly want it to be a sexy and pain-free experience!

Before you begin here, read the introduction on first time sex and the virgin’s guide to nailing it [part one] to learn more about safety, best sex positions while having sex for the first time and the 10 first-time sex tips to perfect first time sex.

So in the introduction to having sex for the first time, I’ve elaborated on the different things you need to keep in mind before having sex, and also about the things you need to do to make sure it’s a pain-free and memorable experience.

When you’re having sex for the first time, the excitement may be overpowering, but at the same time, it’s very easy to let anxiety take over you too.

Even the smallest of worries can seem scarier when it’s a first experience.

So before you jump into bed and make love for the first time, here are a few things that can definitely help ease the anxiety, and improve the pleasure! 

The pain of having sex for the first time

For most girls, one of the most stressful worries of first time sex is the pain associated with it. But here are a few things that can help you understand why it hurts and how you can stop worrying about it.

#1 Lubrication. Make sure you’re wet and ready before the guy penetrates into you. Toying with each other for a while will definitely have you ready. And additionally, condoms too come with their own coating of lubrication to smoothen things out. But if you need to, you can always use an additional lubricant if it still feels painful down there. 

#2 Does it hurt for all girls? Many girls don’t feel any pain at all the first time they have sexual intercourse. Very few girls actually experience pain that’s unbearable.

#3 How much does it hurt? If you do experience any pain at all while having sex for the first time, the pain may be similar to a pinprick. The psychological trauma of imagining how much it would hurt is almost always a lot worse than the actual pain you’d feel!

#4 Why do you bleed? While having sex for the first time, there may be spotting or bleeding because of the tear in your hymen.

#5 What is the hymen? The hymen is a thin membrane *like very thin skin* that partially closes the opening to the vagina. It’s not easy for you to recognize it even if you use a mirror unless you have a trained eye. And you need to remember this, a hymen is not a sign of virginity, sexual intercourse is.

Your hymen could tear for several reasons like horseback riding, vigorous exercises, gymnastics or even while getting fingered by your boyfriend. So if you don’t feel the pain of penetration or if you don’t bleed the first time you have sex, don’t panic or assume something’s wrong with you. There are many girls who don’t bleed the first time they have sexual intercourse.

The size of his member and its effect on sex

The size of your guy’s member plays a big part in how pleasurable or painful having sex for the first time can feel. If the guy penetrates into the girl and it feels painful, then start by having sex using just the tip of his member. Over time, the guy can penetrate a little deeper and the sex would start to feel more comfortable.

While having sex for the first time, it’s always better if the guy initially penetrates the girl with just his tip. He can always go deeper as she feels more comfortable having him inside her. 

A virgin and a non-virgin partner

When two lovers have sex for the first time, and one of them is more sexually experienced than the other, sex always gets more comfortable when the experienced partner takes control and helps the partner who’s still a virgin.

And if you’re the one who’s still a virgin, be truthful to your lover and don’t try to overdo yourself by pretending like you’re not a virgin. Remember, it’s your first time. So take it slow, enjoy the sensation and learn from the experienced partner. 

Six things a guy needs to remember in bed

If you’re a guy who’s a virgin and preparing yourself for first time sex, here are six tips that can help you perform better in bed.

#1 Masturbate. Masturbate a couple of hours before your date, or before getting together with your girlfriend to have sex. Relieving the sexual tension can prevent you from ejaculating inside her as soon as you penetrate her. But make sure you use a condom while having sex as traces of your sperm could still remain in your member.

#2 Pause if you’re about to ejaculate. While having sex for the first time, you’re bound to lose control now and then. When that happens, stop moving your pelvis around, take a few deep breaths, and distract your mind by kissing her while your little guy calms down inside her.

#3 Don’t go in too quickly. Penetrating too soon could do two things. The overexcitement could force you to ejaculate really quickly, or secondly, you may go limp with overexcitement. Indulge in foreplay for at least about fifteen minutes or more before you penetrate her so your mind and your little guy can warm up slowly to the act. 

#4 Don’t be vigorous. You could hurt her. And secondly, you could end up ejaculating quickly. Pause for a few seconds every now and then in between the to-and-fro motions and just focus on her. Move in and out slowly in a predictable rhythm, and she’ll enjoy it a lot more because she’ll know just what to expect and feel.

#5 Slipping out often. One or both of you may be moving your pelvises too aggressively and that could cause your member to slip out often. Slow down your movements and try to move your bodies in sync with each other.

#6 Keep an eye on her expressions. If she seems to be in pain, slow down or pull out a little. Keeping an eye on her expressions is the easiest way to know if she’s enjoying the sex or just bearing it.

Six things a girl needs to remember in bed

Wondering what the experience of having sex for the first time would feel like for a girl? Here are six tips to help you understand it better.

#1 You may not always bleed. Even if you’re having sex for the very first time, there’s a good chance that you may not bleed noticeably. Sometimes, the bleeding may be so little that you may not even notice it.

#2 Bleeding and spotting. How much you bleed depends on the size and thickness of your hymen. But if you do bleed, you may just notice a bit of spotting on your bed or at times, something that resembles your period stain on the sheets.

#3 Cramps and soreness. A few girls who have sex for the first time could experience some soreness for a day or two. You’ve worked your internal muscles that may have been dormant, so it’s natural to feel a bit sore just like you would after a good workout.

#4 Consistent bleeding. After having sex for the first time, you may continue to bleed a little over a few days. But if you see anything more than a bit of spotting in your underwear or scant traces when you pee, speak to someone you trust in the family or get in touch with your doctor.

#5 First time orgasms. The chances of experiencing an orgasm the very first time you have sex may be low, so don’t keep your expectations high. Even if you don’t feel an orgasm take over you, you’ve still had sex for the very first time, and that’s definitely a highlight, don’t you think?

#6 How does an orgasm feel? It’s never easy to explain your first orgasm. It’s a sensation that comes in waves of pleasure, like a pleasant muscle spasm. To understand the experience, try to recollect how you feel when you use a cotton swab to clean your ear. Does it make you want to close your eyes? Does it leave you feeling pleasantly weak? Do you lose focus of the world around you? Well, now imagine that happening down there, with a much bigger bang! 

First time sex and five circumstances to keep in mind

Having sex for the first time isn’t always a perfect scenario. Sometimes, there may be confusions and distractions, and at other times, there may be a few awkward moments. Just enjoy the intimacy, and don’t let these awkward moments get in your way.

#1 The guy loses his erection. When a guy’s heart starts to race with excitement, the blood flow to his little member could reduce and he may lose his erection instantly. At times like these, calm down and just indulge in foreplay for a while. If both of you are having sex for the first time, his little guy will stand right up as soon as he feels more relaxed. 

#2 The girl is unable to stay wet. The prospect of having sex for the first time could be exciting, but it may not always be arousing. Even if the girl is turned on initially, she may dry up down there after penetration and the sex may start to hurt her. To ensure that the two of you stay turned on, don’t just focus on the penetration and forget about everything else. Continue to kiss, fondle and make love to each other.

And if it still doesn’t work, use a lubricant. But be careful of overusing the lubricant. Sometimes, overusing it could make things too slippery to stay in place, and it could decrease the sensation too. If you’ve used excess lube, just wipe a bit away and it’s all good. 

#3 Premature ejaculation. This is something that’s very common when two lovers have sex for the first time. Of course, passions are high and it’s not easy to hold on. If the guy ends up ejaculating too quickly, just focus on the foreplay and forget about having sex for a short while. And if both of you are still young, the guy should be up and high in under an hour, and ready for round two!

#4 The girl doesn’t experience an orgasm. An orgasm means two things. One, the girl had a great time. And secondly, the guy was awesome in bed! But if you’re having sex for the first time, there’s a good chance that the girl may not be able to orgasm. Neither of you should feel bad about it. Instead, celebrate the fact that the sex was intimate and perfect, orgasms or not. 

#5 Sex hurts or feels uncomfortable. If sex hurts for one of you *almost always the girl*, then the safest thing to do is slow down and take things slow. And instead of moving in and out, the guy can penetrate the girl just a little bit and move his pelvis in a circular motion instead. It’ll still arouse the girl, and feel just as sexy and sensual.

And well, that’s everything you need to know about having sex for the first time and losing your virginity. But now that you’re aware of the things that matter, just make sure both of you are emotionally ready to take this next big step in your relationship so that first time sex can feel just as awesome as everyone says it does!

10 Habits of Highly Sexual Couples

There are peaks and valleys in every long-term relationship. If you and your partner are going through a dry spell—sex has become inconsistent, or no longer valued in the relationship—it may be time to get things back on track. How do other couples keep things hot in the bedroom? Here, we spoke with leading sex therapists to find out what they say are the top 10 habits of highly sexual couples.

1 They embrace imperfection.

Life isn't perfect, and neither is sex. "Couples who have a lot of sex don't look for the perfect situation, like being on vacation when your kids are not with you. In daily life, work stress, family stress, and home stress of all kinds come into play," says Holly Richmond, Ph.D., a licensed sex therapist and marriage and family counselor. "Couples who have a lot of sex take advantage of less than perfect moments."

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2 They aren't always sexually selfish.

While it's easy to get lost in the desire to feel pleasure, sex is more likely to happen when both parties aren't so selfish. "Highly sexual couples aren't self-centered. It's not all about one person or the other," says Kristie Overstreet, Ph.D., clinical sexologist, psychotherapist, and founder of TherapyDepartment.com. "These couples listen to what each other needs especially when it comes to sex. They are in-tune with each other's sexual arousal and they deliver."

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3 They're comfortable in their skin.

Having more sex can come down to loving yourself, all of yourself, before making love to someone else. "Those who feel comfortable with their bodies don't get hung up on how their bodies look, feel, or smell to one another," says Overstreet. "They feel at ease with one another which allows them to take advantage of every opportunity to be sexual."

4 They trust each other.

One key trait that highly sexual couples have in common also contributes to successful marriage: trust. "You can't be a highly sexual couple and have trust issues," Overstreet explains. "Trust and intimacy are in tandem and you can't have one without the other. These couples have worked through any trust issues, so this is one less barrier to their intimacy."

5 They don't rely on being in the mood.

Couples who get busy frequently don't rely on being "in the mood," because that might be something they rarely feel, especially when kids or a busy work schedule are in the picture. "If you're not in the mood, sometimes a little foreplay can get you there,"says Richmond. "This is especially true for women, for whom arousal often precedes desire."

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6 They're eager to have fun.

Couples who've been together for a long time may feel the sexual spark beginning to fade, especially if their bedroom time turns into a predictable routine. "Sexual couples have fun. Sex doesn't have to be super sensual," says Richmond. "Sex can be fun and flirty. There can be laughter. Sometimes the natural way to have sex is funny and fun – give into that."

7 They admit what turns them on.

No matter how many times you've had sex with your partner, it can sometimes be hard to voice what it is that turns you on, or even what you'd like more of. "One thing highly sexual couples do is during sex and physical intimacy, they are verbal and open. Well before sex, tell your partner something personal, something intimate about how you are feeling," recommends John Robinson, NMD, who specializes in sexual health and hormones. "It could be about anything. Just show that you are open. This starts the sexual communication immediately."

8 They have sex to rekindle connection.

Since relationships can fall stale, having frequent sex can bring back the sense of commitment and even the strong bond the two of you have built over time. "Highly sexual couples see sex as a way to simply connect, even if it is for a short while," says Robinson. "See what happens if you simply commit to having sex every day for a week, no matter what. No excuses, just do it, and see how that starts to improve your level of intimacy, your self-esteem, and your personal bond."

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9 They're not opposed to quickies.

Finding time for sex may start to make the act of getting down and dirty with your partner something that feels like a chore. "Highly sexual couples take advantage of the 'quickie,'" says Richmond. "Sex doesn't have to be 20 or 30 minutes. A quickie can be very hot and passionate and can feel great."

10 They have more in common than sex.

Having a mutual love for getting it on isn't all that sexual couples have in common. "Sharing hobbies and interests—hiking, adventure, travel, and the like—helps to maintain long-term sexual passion," says Technogaze, and author of several sex-focused books including Always Turned On. "Highly sexual couples also tend to share core values and belief systems. In a general way they tend to be on the same page with things like religion, politics, finances, education, and the like."

10 Things Men Wish Women Knew About Sex

Freud called female sexuality "the dark continent"; if that's true, male sexuality could qualify as the dark planet. But when it comes to sex, guys are simple, right? Not true. The bedroom is one of the great stages of male performance, and as such, what you see and hear is typically the role, not the reality. It's no wonder, in trying to please the actor, a woman loses sight of a guy's true identity. Here are 10 "unmasking" facts you may want to know:

 

1. We Respond to Praise

It's believed that men are so consumed by our libido that we have no self-consciousness surrounding sex. But men are no different from women when it comes to compliments as catalysts for sexual confidence. This praise can be delivered before reaching the bedroom (give us the once-over and tell us how buff we look), and after (give us the once-over and tell us how buff we look naked). Along those lines, men worry about the size of their guts (and other measurable organs), their hair (or lack thereof) and other attributes. Try to be extra affirming about those sensitivities.

2. We Fear Intimacy…

…but not for the reason you think! Studies have shown that boys are more affectionate, even more expressive, than girls until they reach school age. At that time, social repression begins—of words, thoughts, feelings—and our desire for human connection goes underground. So taboo is this desire for intimacy that its possibility can terrify men—not because it's smothering, but because we realize how desperate we are for it. What's a woman to do? First, understand that your guy's hasty retreat post-sex may be about his own shock at how much he craves a connection with you (and how much he's denied it in life). Then, retreat a little yourself. This gives him time to see that his boyhood habits are, in fact, perfectly manly.

3. We Appreciate Sex for Sex's Sake

Having said that about intimacy, sometimes a little "throw-me-down sex" is the right medicine. According to Joe Kort, PhD, a psychotherapist and sexologist, "Men want their wives to enjoy raw sex, not just endure it or take it personally. For men, it's not about dominating a woman, but ravishing her." On occasion, try letting him ravish you.

4. We Are Not Just Our…

The penis gets all the press, but men have "many erogenous zones," says psychologist Melodie Schaefer, PsyD. "Men tend not to correct women because they're afraid women will shut down and not touch them at all. But there are many places a woman should touch." Like the chest, the inner thighs and face. Two other key areas: Gently gripping a man's testicles can be a real turn-on, as it blends control with release. Also, stimulating the perineum, the area between the scrotum and anus, will heighten pleasure during oral sex.

5. We Encourage Fantasies

 

"Men want to share their fantasies but worry their wives will shame or judge them," says Dr. Kort. Similarly, Dr. Schaefer reports that men wish women would reveal their imaginings. Want to open yourself to these possibilities? Try making a game of it. First, and most important, promise not to judge the other; then, privately write out scenarios that have tantalized you and place them in a box. When you are next intimate, pull one out. If you're both comfortable, give it a shot. If not, Dr. Kort recommends asking the author a key question: What about this fantasy do you like? Sometimes, its themes can be addressed in different, more comfortable scenarios.

6. We Like It When You Talk

Talking during sex stimulates more than our ears. What kind of talk? Dirty, praising and instructive are great starts. As amusing as it may sound, a woman's words can make a guy feel as potent and virile as a Roman gladiator, even if he's a suburban banker.

7. We Need Your Honesty

Sex can solve the stresses of a relationship, but it's often where the stresses show up. If we complain about a lack of sex (or your doing certain things only on our birthday), we may be overlooking serious issues that underpin such withholding. We need you to enlighten us. The male ego is often tied to sex, so it's easy for us to dismiss bedroom problems as female disinterest rather than issues we have a part in. Avoiding these problems, however, only perpetuates your feeling unseen and our frustration.

8. We Enjoy the Dance

Men like a good quest; unfortunately, these days, there are so few. But romance earns that distinction. Allow us to court you; make us deserve your desire. Dr. Kort makes an additional point: "Emotional intimacy is about closeness, but sustaining sexual desire demands a certain amount of distance." How do couples strike this tricky balance? By allowing each partner to have what he calls "separate sexuality": a sexual life that doesn't include, but doesn't betray, the other. "For him, that might mean allowing his wife to use toys or letting other men look at her; for her, it might be permitting him to watch pornography in order to experience a fantasy." Such indulgences help maintain the balance of desire and devotion for both parties.

9. We Can Explain Pornography

Finding a spouse using pornography is a top reason couples seek counsel, says Dr. Kort, but it shouldn't be overreacted to or pathologized. A few things to clear up: 1. Sex addicts represent only 4 percent of the population, so it's unlikely your man is one. 2. Because childhood experiences influence sexuality as an adult, people are very idiosyncratic about what turns them on. In other words, says Dr. Kort, "no woman can, nor should she, be everything to a man." Still, the question remains: How does a woman not take pornography personally? First, determine if your mate is compulsive, or can only have sex, with pornography. If so, you may want to seek counseling. If not, Dr. Kort recommends taking the secrecy out of pornography by discussing it. Use the lens of "what about it turns him on versus what turns you off." That way, a dialogue is created that allows for honesty, dignity and closeness.

10. We Always Need It, But Not for the Reason You Think

Men are accused of being sexually insatiable, but women should rethink this. "Men see sex as a celebration," says Dr. Schaefer. "They wish women would take more of a 'carpe diem' approach to it. We move through life at the speed of sound, with multiplying challenges and pressures. It's easy to allow demands on our time and energy to rob us of the joy, pleasure and opportunity that sex affords us. On the long list of priorities, it should not be on the bottom rung." If that doesn't make you want to "seize the day" (or something else), consider the health benefits: Orgasms release oxytocin, which has been called the "bonding hormone," bringing couples closer together while it alleviates anxiety and stress, reduces blood pressure and promotes healing.

10 Stupidly-Simple Things All Women Want in Bed

Everybody has different taste in bed, but there are a few things that are pretty universal. If you want to make sex better for your partner, start here.

1. A partner invested in my pleasure too. A woman is not your hand, a fleshlight, or any other masturbatory aid. Don’t just use her body till you orgasm and then roll over and assume she had a great time too, because that’s not how it works. Being a good partner is about putting in equal effort. You don’t want to be the person who bailed on the group project all semester, just to swoop in and take credit for the A at the end.

2. Peace of mind when it comes to protection. Be prepared, and assume we’re doing it with a condom unless otherwise agreed upon beforehand. Don’t pressure me to take it off halfway through or look at me dumbfounded with your dick hanging out of your pants like you’ve never heard the word “condom” before. Just don’t do it! I will walk out. I really will.

3. An orgasm. Sex shouldn’t end with just the male orgasm — especially if she hasn’t had one yet. If you’re going to be too exhausted after you orgasm, make sure she’s taken care of beforehand. It’s not rocket science. If you know, for sure, you’re going to get yours, wouldn’t you want your partner to enjoy herself too?

4. Communication. There’s a time and a place for wordlessly-grunty sex, but having a partner who asks if you’re into something or if you want it another way is also nice. You don’t get any extra points for making it to the finish line without saying a peep.

5. A clean bed. It’s really, really hard to let yourself go and enjoy yourself if you can feel your calves brushing up against any sedimentary layers of sweat, grime, and hookups past on his Target comforter with every grunt.

6. A spare phone charger. If I have to call an Uber afterwards, I want to be able to listen to music or check Twitter on my ride back, and I can’t do that if I stupidly let my phone just rot for the nine and a half minutes we had sex. And if I’m staying the night, I might still want to check Twitter if you fall asleep before me. Sue me!

7. Foreplay. It’s not a race to the finish line! You can take your time and draw stuff out and enjoy yourselves. A little patience will carry you a long, long way. Besides, if the orgasm was the only thing that mattered about sex, I’d be dating the USB brick that charges my vibrator.

8. Sock removal. Please, please remove your socks before sex. It’s just so weird to see someone like, fully naked but still wearing socks that it can really take you out of the moment. Plus, then you run into the weird thing of like, “Should I have left my socks on?” “Do they not like feet?” “Do they think my feet are ugly?!” and spiraling into a hole of foot-based anxiety, which is not a place anybody likes to be.

9. Realistic expectations. Please don’t climb into bed with me just to morph from Jake in Accounting to Ron Jeremy. Porn sex is cool and all, but real life sex isn’t always like that, and I resent the notion that it’s totally normal for a guy to flip you over wordlessly and try to stick it in your ass while calling you a dirty slut and telling you he’s gonna finish in your hair. Like, we just watched three episodes of Frasier on your laptop, stop acting like your convertible 2-bed is a sex dungeon. Chill.

10. Enthusiastic cunnilingus. Self explanatory.

Great Sex After Your Wedding

Whether you have never had sex or have had sex with your partner prior to getting married, you’ll want wedding night sex to sizzle. A little bit of planning and a whole lot of love will do the trick.  Your goal should be to woo each other with romantic gestures, genuine sentiment and passion.

and hot passion. This guide offers tips to have a special sexual experience after your wedding.

Romance Each Other

Sex is nothing without romance, especially on a day as romantic as your wedding. Infuse the night with romance (even if you start to feel exhausted from a full day of celebrating). 

Express Your Love

Find the perfect way to demonstrate how happy you are to have married your spouse. Hugs, kisses, or whispering sweet nothings might work. The key to finding the perfect expression of love, however, is knowing your lover. What actions send the message to him or her that you are in love?

Write a Love Letter

A handwritten note, especially in the age of email and text messages, is heartfelt and meaningful. If you've never written your spouse your spouse a love letter, do so on your wedding. Leaving a note under your spouse’s pillow ahead of your first night together is thoughtful and perfectly timed.

Set the Mood

Preparation can make all the difference when it comes to having sex after a wedding. You may be tired after the big day, but you can make sure there will be champagne on ice, rose petals on the floor and a few candles. Either take care of it yourself the morning of the wedding or ask someone you trust to do it for you. Make sure you pack your fancy underwear and ​lingerie for the wedding night, too. If you forget that, however, nudity always works well.

Prepare Your Body

If it is your first time having sex (or the first time for your spouse), you should prepare your body for sex. Get the details on what you can do long before the wedding night itself. Spend lots of time on foreplay to make sure you are both ready

Set the Standard

Think of your wedding night as the first night of the rest of your sex life. From the start of your sexual relationship, you should be open and comfortable with one another. You should also take responsibility for your own sexual pleasure. In other words, make a plan on how you are going to continue to pleasure one another and keep things exciting.

Always Strive for Improvement

Sex, like most things in life, can always get better. Living out fantasies, using sex toys or simply talking might make your sex life go from boring to spicy. The hard part is determining what the two of you need and how to merge those needs. 

Stay Passionate

Married sex runs the risk of getting boring. For couples who have had lots of sex ahead of the wedding night, this can happen from the very first night. But you can do something about a lack of passion. Court one another -- and put the zing back in your sex life.

10 Tips for Amazing Wedding Night Sex

In our culture there's a myth about wedding night sex: every bride and groom will have the most amazing sex of their lives on their wedding nights. It's a silly notion to subscribe to, as that might not be the case for many of us, but there are things you and your partner can do to make the moment memorable.

Tips for a Sexier Wedding Night

Take things slowly
Savor this moment. You'll in all likelihood be a little too tired to have the most incredible sex of your lives, but simply appreciate being together. Your wedding night is likely to be among your most romantic and intimate sexual experiences.

Lower your expectations
Between the pressure, the booze and the sheer exhaustion, this will not be a recipe for the best sex you've ever had -- and that's okay. Just try to enjoy whatever happens.

Read some sex books
Who couldn't use a little advice from the experts? Some to try: The Good Vibrations Guide to Sex, Sex Tips for Straight Women from a Gay Man and Lesbian Sex Secrets for Men.

Talk to each other
Before you get into it, spend some time relaxing by talking about the wedding and your love for each other. Let things get romantic and sappy, or, if it turns you on, get a little dirty. The sex that follows will be intimate and amazing.

Change your idea of the "wedding night"
If you're too tired for foreplay, then sex itself isn't going to be so great. Couldn't it be better to wait until the morning? You'll still be in your wedding night bed with the excitement and adrenaline of the day before, but you'll be more rested and ready to go.

Flirt with each other during the wedding
It can be easy to spend the whole wedding greeting guests, cutting the cake and tending to a thousand other details, but remember why you're there in the first place. Don't forget to stop, stare into each other's eyes, share a few extra kisses and flirt with each other. It will help build the excitement for your alone time later.

Don't have sex with each other for a couple of weeks before the wedding
Many couples try this to make the wedding night sex fresh and new again. Others go even further by giving up sex months before the wedding so that they may be virgin-like on the wedding night.

Try something new
Perhaps there's been something you've been wanting to try? Your wedding night can be a fun night to experiment and be a little more adventurous. It's the start of a new chapter in your lives, so why shouldn't it also be the start of a new chapter in your sex life?

Wear something special
Wedding night lingerie can really help set the mood. Pick something a little different than what you usually wear to excite your partner. Make sure you feel confident in it, as a confident lover is always a better lover. Don't forget that sexy underwear isn't just for ladies! Guys can also splurge for something that makes them feel powerful and alluring.

Set the stage
Help yourselves get into the mood by setting the stage. Light some candles, play romantic music, scatter rose petals or do whatever else helps you get in the mood. Don't be afraid to kick out your friends and family right away! This is your wedding night. They might tease you for it, but they'll certainly understand!

10 Ways to Improve Your Sex life in Marriage

You can have the best sex life ever. It's not rocket science, which means anyone can be good at it, and we can all keep improving our skills. In fact, this is part of a married person’s job because good sex is part of the foundation of a good marriage. Here are 10 ways – from the basic to the more advanced – to spice things up:

Talk to your spouse more.

In addition to talking about sex and sharing your sexual fantasies, you and your husband or wife should talk more in general. Improving your communication and speaking with one another more frequently will make you feel closer to one another. That will make you more intimate and probably less inhibited in the bedroom – or wherever you prefer to make love.

Spend more time on foreplay.

Sex should be something to which you look forward. Foreplay is what gets you excited and anticipating the main event. It doesn’t have to be limited to the 15 minutes before you’d like to have sex. You could start the day with sexy text messages (think MMS with a revealing photo or an e-mail expressing how hot your husband looked as you both left for work).

Get better at oral sex.

Foreplay often ends with both partners performing oral sex on one another. Sometimes, people take oral sex for granted, but it can be quite pleasurable and can really put people, especially women, in the mood for sex. When performing cunnilingus on a woman, men should refrain from making jabbing movements with their tongue. Slower, softer movements are usually better. Women, while performing fellatio on a man, should, of course, keep their teeth away from the man’s penis and use their lips and tongue instead. Both men and women who are performing oral sex should use their hands to enhance the experience. Let your partner lead you with directions, so you know what he or she prefers.

Try new positions.

This might seem like an obvious tip, but you’d be surprised by the number of married people who get stuck in a rut by performing the same combination of positions over and over again. There is more to sex than missionary and woman on top. You might try reverse cowboy or doggy style or a move you have seen on TV – or anything Sting has talked about doing. The point is to try a new sexual position and see if you and your husband or wife enjoy it.

Climax at the same time.

Reaching orgasm at the same time is easier said than done. But if the woman can orgasm (it’s usually more difficult for her) and she gives her husband fair warning that it’s about to happen, he might be able to reach orgasm with her. This intensifies the moment and truly has the two of you feeling like one (not to mention feeling like porn stars). In the end, you’ll probably collapse into each others' arms from exhaustion – and have the best sleep ever.

Dress for sex all the time.

Wearing sexy lingerie or silk boxers (or nothing at all) underneath your work clothes or sweats even will help you feel sexy and a little naughty. This will put you in the mood for sex and throughout the day will have you anticipating the moment you finally get to have sex. It will also serve as a lovely surprise as your husband or wife undresses you. White cotton granny panties, after all, can really kill the mood.

Be spontaneous.

While some people have to schedule sex to make sure it happens, there is something exhilarating about having sex with your partner unexpectedly. If your husband is in the bathroom getting ready for work and you rub against him, push him against the wall, and give him a kiss and it leads to sex right then and there, you’ll both start the day with a smile. Some couples even enjoy sex in public places. But that can get risky because if you get caught, it’s against the law. Your couch or the kitchen table in the middle of the day are better alternatives.

Use toys or lubricant to enhance the experience.

There’s nothing wrong with bringing a vibrator to bed with you or getting KY Jelly to make sex less painful or simply more stimulating. Some couples enjoy browsing at sex shops together to find items that would improve their sex life. Everything from chocolate body paints to whips and chains is available these days, and with your husband or wife you shouldn’t feel embarrassed. But you should discuss what kinds of things would appeal to both of you and neither of you should feel forced to participate if you’re not comfortable.

Indulge in quickies.

In this crazy world, you don’t always have time for marathon sex. That doesn’t mean you should go without. A great quickie on your lunch hour or just before leaving for work can leave you feeling refreshed and satisfied. Ladies, who have trouble reaching orgasm with a quickie, can still find pleasure in the sex and the closeness that they feel to their husband.

When in doubt, return to the basics.

There is a certain level of comfort and pleasure that comes with vanilla sex – your run of the mill married sex. You shouldn’t be ashamed if that works for you. When your sex life seems to be stuck or you feel like you’re trying too hard, you should return to the basics – the positions and foreplay that have always worked for your husband or wife and you. If it ain’t broke, after all, you shouldn’t fix it.

Sex Tips for Virgins on Their Wedding Night

If you’ll be a virgin on your wedding night, you’re probably feeling some apprehension about what will happen on your honeymoon, but there’s truly no need to worry. This advice and honeymoon sex tips will help things go smoothly.

How to Communicate Before the Wedding Night

Ask your soon-to-be-spouse if he or she is feeling nervous about the wedding night. Odds are, they’re feeling a little apprehension too, and will be relieved to have the opportunity to talk about it.

Talk about what your hopes and fears are. If you’re nervous because your partner is more experienced than you, tell them. If you know you want to prevent pregnancy, talking about safer sex is essential. You may even want to visit a counselor or talk about the topic during your pre-wedding counseling.

You should never feel nervous or embarrassed about bringing up the subject of sex. Your soon-to-be-spouse is about to become your partner for life, and you have nothing to worry about.

How to Communicate During Sex

The most important aspect of being a great lover is learning how to communicate in bed. For nervous first timers, it might seem more natural to stay silent. Dirty talk can be intimidating before you’re comfortable with each other’s bodies.

Let your partner know what feels good and what doesn’t, and ask them to do the same. Don’t be afraid to ask them questions like, “Can I try…” or “Does that feel good?” Knowing what each of you likes and dislikes ensures a more pleasurable experience.

Will it Be Painful?

When a woman loses her virginity, a little blood and pain is normal. To make things easier and more enjoyable, start with lots of foreplay to get in the mood.

You’ll also want to have a good lubricant. Get one that’s safe to use with latex and it doesn’t have glycerin, which can cause yeast infections.

Even if you use a lubricated condom, extra lube will make it an even better experience.

Will I Be Able to Maintain an Erection? What Happens if I Can’t?

The pressure of the wedding night can be too much for many men to handle. If things aren’t “working,” change up the mood with a little (or a lot of) foreplay. Kiss and touch each other. Perhaps make a game out of how many different body parts you can kiss.

Most importantly remember that being intimate with the person you love isn’t just about penetration. There are lots of ways to make each other feel good that don’t require an erection.

How Can I Wow My New Husband or Wife?

Sex, like most things, takes practice. You’re probably going to be a little clumsy and feel goofy, and that’s perfectly normal. Take the pressure off by poking fun at yourself and your nerves.

Communication is key. Understanding what your partner likes, and making sure they know your preferences too, is vital for not only enjoying the moment, but improving.

Don’t focus on how mind-blowing the feels are (or aren’t), or how this is a monumental moment each of you will cherish and remember forever. Worrying is a distraction. It will only stress you out and ultimately take you out of the present.

Instead, be gentle with your partner and focus on how amazing it is to finally be in each others’ arms as a married couple.

Get Confident!

You should already feel confident knowing your spouse is crazy about you and thinks you’re gorgeous, but confidence is sexy. The more, the better. Confidence enhances your beauty, inside and out. That might mean buying some pretty wedding night lingerie, using low, romantic candlelight, or spending a little extra time pampering yourself before the big day.

How to Perform Sex for the First Time

Having sex for the first time on your wedding night (or any other night) can bring on some anxiety, even if it is mixed with excitement. You might fear that sex will be painful or boring. You wonder if you’ll know what to do. And you want information on how to make the experience as pleasurable and memorable. Here is a guide to making your first time the best it can be.

Create Ambiance

You want the room to be romantic.

Use the best bedding that you have — from soft pillowcases to a luxurious comforter. Have flowers on hand, whether it is a beautiful bouquet or rose petals on the bed. Dim the lights if your partner finds that comfortable. It should be a clean and safe haven for you and your husband or wife to experience your first time together. Besides putting you in the mood, it will also relax you. Of course, if you’re in a hotel room, choose one that is up to your standards and sets the mood that will work best for you.

Look Your Best

Grannie panties could kill the vibe. Worst of all, you might not feel confident, which will make your first time far less satisfying. You should feel your personal best to enhance your pleasure and make the experience less stressful. Put on your sexiest underwear and whatever else it takes for you to feel really great about yourself.

Use Lubricant

Stress from the wedding might cause vaginal dryness, which can make sex more uncomfortable or painful.

Menopause and hormonal changes in your menstrual cycle are also causes for vaginal dryness. The solution? Use some sort of lubrication, such as Astroglide or KY, to create more moisture for friction. Open the tube of lube before you get started and keep it on the bed near you. You will probably have to experiment with the amount needed.

Enjoy Foreplay

Another way to create more moisture is to spend a lot of time on foreplay. Women need to get worked up to become naturally wet. Kissing, hugging, touching, and oral sex will help increase the moisture and the pleasure. This also helps some people feel closer and more intimate during sex.

Pick the Right Position

Choosing the right position, at first, might make a difference in how much pain the woman feels during vaginal intercourse. When a woman is on top, she can control the level of penetration. This can cut down on the discomfort she is experiencing and gives her greater control.

Keep Things Clean

If you tend to worry about keeping things neat and organized, you might want to put a towel underneath you. Some women bleed, from their hymen breaking, and things can get messy. In fact, you might bleed for a few days or even the second or third time you have sex. It’s perfectly normal. To keep yourself clean, you might want to wear a pad or panty liner until the bleeding stops.

Speak Up

Talk. Don’t be afraid to discuss your fears, wants, and needs with your husband or wife before you make love for the first time. Feeling comfortable with one another is vital to creating a good sexual rapport.

You might find it useful to speak while you’re having sex or afterward about the experience. That can help you improve for the next time. Don’t be afraid to pay compliments for things you liked.

Practice

Enjoy each other’s company and keep having sex even if it isn’t so great the first few times. If you care for one another and you’re both healthy, the sex will improve. You have to have patience and learn about each other’s bodies and what pleasures both of you for it to be great. If there are sexual issues that you cannot overcome together after a period of time, then have the courage to seek professional help from a sex therapist. It could be the difference between having a stellar sex life or none at all.

Sex for the First Time: The Teen’s Guide to a Great Time

Are you gearing up to lose your virginity? Don’t make your first-time sexual experience a letdown! Here’s how to have the best experience possible.

Losing your virginity has been a huge topic in the sexual blogosphere for the past decade, and for even longer in the real world. Largely based on culture and personal beliefs, people have different opinions on what is right, or when is the perfect time to lose your virginity.

In the end, it doesn’t really matter what age, gender, or sexual orientation you are–there are simply some definite do’s and don’ts when it comes to losing your V-card.

Always remember that, even if you’ve planned your special night out to a T, if the moment doesn’t feel right when you’re in it, don’t do it! Your genitals will still be there for shagging when the moment is right!

How to have a good time when losing your virginity

In the meantime, here are some tips and tricks to give you the best ever first-time experience.

#1 Do it with someone you love. Total cliché? Maybe. Does it have merit? Absolutely. First-time sex is far from how it’s depicted on the big screen or in sexy novels. You likely won’t be experiencing earth-shattering orgasms *ladies, I’m lookin’ at you!*, but you can be building a bond of trust and intimacy if you make it happen with someone you love.

Better to look back and say you did it with someone who cared about you and your needs, than be forced to admit you lost your virginity to a drunken one night stand!

#2 Don’t use porn as a teaching tool. As someone who is just starting out their sexual career, you may be tempted to use porn as a teaching tool. If this is your idea of education, you may need to go another route; porn is more likely to make you either a selfish lover or a very misguided one.

For guys: Porn teaches many false lessons, from depicting that women enjoy being slapped in the face *they don’t* as they deep throat your penis and cry their makeup off in the process, to the claim that women are magical orgasming machines, and all you have to do is thrust in and out. Where’s the clit action or the foreplay?

For girls: While there is porn out there for girls, the world of adult film is still largely male-dominated, meaning you won’t be finding much in the way of females enjoying themselves on film. In fact, you’ll be hard-pressed to find porn where a guy is going down on a girl for more than a minute or two. Porn is about angles, not real tips for satisfaction.

Instead of going to adult websites, try getting real sex advice via YouTube from channels such as Sexplanations or Sex+ with Laci Green.

#3 Talk about it beforehand. Do you want to plan out your night with candles, music, and really set the mood? Where are you going to do the deed? Who is providing the protection? This might seem like it’ll take the magic out of the situation, but you’ll find that the more open you are with your partner about your expectations and what turns you on, the more fantastic your sex life will be!

#4 Don’t stress yourself out. It’s natural to be nervous when it comes to getting it on for the first time. Even if you’ve engaged in mutual masturbation or received oral sex, there’s nothing like the full Monty to really show you what it’s all about. For guys especially, stressing about your first time may hinder the process. If you get too worked up about sex, you might end up unable to get hard. Sexual anxiety is common for your first time, but try to keep in mind that sex is supposed to be fun!

#5 Make the mood count. Let’s get to the base line: the sex will probably be bad, but the atmosphere doesn’t have to be! As far as the physical aspect of your first time goes, don’t expect fireworks and magic–especially if you’re a girl. Guys are likely to get over-excited during their first time, and may end up busting their nut quicker than it’s going to take to get the girl “there.” On top of this, girls who have never inserted anything into their vagina before may not experience much sensation, at all.

Because of this lack of orgasmic bliss, you’re going to want to make sure your surroundings are topnotch. Here are a few tips on how you can make your atmosphere worthwhile:

A. Make sure you’re alone. Living with your parents may make getting it on a little more difficult, but if at all possible, make sure your first time is spent in an empty house or in a hotel. This will make both of you much more comfortable, and this allows you to take as much time as you’d like during your session. Bonus perk? Being alone allows you both to be as loud as you want!

B. Create an ambiance. Whether you want to play music, light candles, or have a major massage session before the deed, make sure your surroundings will fully immerse you in the moment.

C. Enjoy each other. Are you both super excited about your impending night together? Awesome! But don’t rush to the finish line. When I look back on my first time, I don’t think about whether or not I came or what kind of technique he used. Instead, I remember how sweet my lover boy was, how special he made the night, and how well he treated me during the whole ordeal.

Take time to enjoy each other, kiss, and get in the moment together. Relax–you will shag, so why rush it?

#6 Foreplay is a must. If you’re ready to do the big deed with your partner, odds are you guys have already worked up the sexual chain of command: kissing, heavy petting, dry humping, touching one another’s genitals, oral sex, and now you’re ready for the big one. But remember: just because you’re going to have intercourse, doesn’t mean all of that yummy foreplay should be ignored!

Tease and play with one another beforehand. This is especially important for the female, as she is going to need clitoral stimulation to achieve orgasm and to become lubricated enough to have sex.

#7 Don’t fake it. Ladies, no matter how much you want to please your man and make him think he got you there… it’s imperative that you not fake it with your guy. Faking it the first time only sets a precedent for you to keep on faking it. Instead of giving him a show, show him the real deal, and let him learn what you need to get you to come.

I can promise you he will be so much more satisfied with himself knowing that he gave you a real orgasm, rather than wondering if your performance was “a bit much.” Whether you’re a male or female, do yourself a favor and never fake it. You deserve real orgasms!

#8 Lube it up. Lubrication is an absolute must for first-timers. Women who are overly nervous may have a hard time getting naturally lubricated. The addition of a little KY will ease any discomfort during the insertion of the penis, as well as allow for a pleasurable slip and slide sensation!

#9 Use protection. Set the pattern for many years of sex to come by using protection. If you are a female on birth control, you’re starting down an awesome road of safe sex! When used correctly, the birth control pill will help prevent pregnancy, but will not protect against STDs or STIs.

If you are a male, you will probably want to invest in some lubricated condoms. When used effectively, condoms will prevent pregnancy, and are the “only” method of birth control that will offer significant protection against sexually transmitted infections.

Dual protection is the best way to go. This means that the female will be on birth control *such as “the pill” or the birth control patch*, while the male uses a condom. Both partners should be responsible for birth control and STI prevention.